Trading my FOMO for the JOMO

First of all, sincerely, thank you for all of the wonderful and heartfelt blessings and messages this weekend on our family’s move into our new house. We are pleased to finally have roots again and a place to call home. We have been in limbo for quite some time deciding which direction to take. Special thanks to Sevenodd, Inc, a/k/a my brother, Todd, for yet again building us a special home.

As I was reading the messages on Facebook, it struck me that some of you wondered how in the world I could find the time, to be a mom, a wife, and have the energy, and the stamina to open a new store, manage two others and still find away to oversee a house construction, and yet another move. Let me assure you, up front, I. AM. NOT. SUPERWOMAN…not even close! No indeed! Instead, I am one very tired lady with way too much on her plate! There. I said it!  (I ALSO have a dedicated Dream Team and one of the BEST management teams around!)

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My southern upbringing wouldn’t have me do anything less than to say “yes” all of the time, but I know this pace can only be temporary or other aspects of your life will suffer.  Socrates once said, “Beware the bareness of a busy life.” More times than I can count, I am hearing, “You are just so busy! How do you do it?” I do not want to get to the point in life where all this activity feels barren.

When I look back at how I let my life get so busy, I realize it wasn’t a conscious effort to become busier, do more, own more, and owe more. In a good way, things just keep building up and falling into place.  One of the most important things I am now setting out to do is quietly begin a “busy boycott.”

In a society that always wants more, it’s important to draw a line in the sand. Have you ever done “it?” Have you ever set boundaries? It is so hard for me to say “no”, sometimes!  But what I’ve learned is if I can draw the line with my heart, I can take a stand with a smile, dump the guilt around doing less, and instead of disappointing others, remind them what’s important in their own lives by honoring what’s important in mine. My “manifesto” is a list of my non negotiable priorities that guide me, especially when I struggle with the call to do more.

Observe an Anchor Day, and Keep it Holy.

This isn’t a Sabbath in the traditional sense. It’s not a Saturday or a Sunday and it’s not primarily dedicated to spiritual nourishment. But it is a Sabbath—a day set apart for refreshing. I call it an Anchor Day because I can position it in the middle of the week, to ground me in the hustle and bustle of a busy life.

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Now that I, once again, have a place to call “home”, I don’t want to plan a single thing outside the home on this day. Everything I do on my Anchor Day will be home-centered. DIYs, trying out a new crock pot recipe, organizing a messy space… these are all things I get to do on my Anchor Day.  I really identify with the words of Maya Anglou:

“The ache of home lives in all of us.”

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Anchor Day addresses this ache and fills me up so I can be better at all that I do.

Won’t you join me? Let’s trade our FOMO for the JOMO.

FOMO. The Fear of missing out

Let’s begin to protect our health, our loves, and our life. If we do this with a kind heart, our efforts won’t be seen as selfish or isolating, but instead will allow us to be and give our best self. Creating boundaries makes room to expand in all directions. We will free up time, space, and attention to expand in any direction.

By committing to do less, we are going to miss out on things, but instead of fear, we can feel joy; joy that we have a choice, joy that we are protecting what matters most, and joy because we will feel well, or at least well rested. Because we are doing less, we get to choose the things that mean the most, and we have the attention and energy to be engaged and truly enjoy what we’re doing.

 

 

The opposite of a busy life isn’t a lazy life, it’s a full life. No need to apologize for daydreaming, stargazing, or any activity that speaks to your soul. Take a long walk, a short nap, or sit quietly.

 

How about you? Does an anchor day sound like a good idea? Can you skip the FOMO and relish the JOMO?

I will (fingers crossed) be on vacation soon. Or maybe I will vacation and wonder into a few states and shop, leisurely. Not sure when, but soon. Until then I will (hopefully) honor my Anchor Day, refreshed and renewed.

Have a restful and peaceful week, everyone!

Living the Dream,

Lynne

 

 

 

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